Quixotic Delirium
by Intempesta Nox
Summary: Oscillating between sanity and insanity, Sasuke makes a choice. Will he be able to reclaim Naruto or will he find the disillusion that will truly make him lose his existence? SasuNaru , NaruSai
1. Pain

Chapter 1: Pain

Rating: PG-13 (T-for now)

Pairing: SasuNaru, NaruSai

Disclaimer: We do not own these characters. They all belong to Kishimoto!

**Quixotic Delirium**

**----1----**

_You gotta hurt in order to know, fall in order to grow, lose in order to gain, because most of life's lessons are learned because of pain._

Sasuke took a step backward and smiled inwardly. Two weeks ago he had left Orochimaru without permission because his training had come to a stagnant point. He had been going through several weeks without any form of training – without killing – and had decided to put matters into his own hands. He had to fulfill his purpose, after all, and his method of training gave him the thrill, the rush he needed to awaken every part of his body, to pulsate power through every pore of his skin. His training consisted of killing every shinobi that came his way, and he now felt a sense of peacefulness as a result. There was nothing better than feeling the extent of his powers, but he wanted more. Power was infinite.

Drip.

Drip.

He turned his head upwards and felt rain drops gently land on his face. Rain. Scowling, he used his right hand to wipe the offending rain drops off. Rain would only serve to wash off his scent, and he wanted the chase that would ensue when friends of those he killed would try and hunt him down for revenge. It always happened - those foolish friends filled with rage only accomplished meeting the same gruesome death their comrades had suffered. Such idiots. Comrades and friends were petty things, only a distraction. Every man was for himself and _only_ himself.

Drip.

Drip.

He extended his hand, and felt something drip on his finger from a tree branch next to him. He slowly brought his finger to his sleeve and cleaned it, leaving a bright red mark on the otherwise white cloth.

Without a glance back, he left the clearing as the rain finally thundered down.

--------

"Sasuke-kun, you were not given permission to leave…Orochimaru-sama is extremely disappointed in you," Kabuto said, his voice serious but his lips hinting at a smirk.

"Look, Kabuto, you stay out of this. This does not concern you, and I will have my way here," growled Sasuke as he walked past him.

"You think this is a game, Sasuke-kun," said Kabuto above a whisper, his voice mocking now. "It seems that you are still a child, and we were wrong to hold you in great esteem."

"And maybe I was wrong to choose you, to give you power," a voice that sounded like a slither said behind him.

Sasuke turned and saw the man, or rather what resembled a man, stand behind him threateningly.

"There was a reason I gave you the power. You know that you were supposed to be my new container, Sasuke-kun. Had you forgotten this? Or did that sudden visit from the Konoha brats some months ago mess with your mind? My opinion of you was so low that I thought you had…reverted to old tendencies of comradeship and run back to them.

"Sasuke-kun, during your sudden trip I fell ill. It was time for me to change into a new body - your body, the container that I carefully looked after and that I shaped to my need. But you see, there was a flaw in my perfect plan. I happened to give power to a boy that does not appear to want to pay me back. Sasuke-kun, you should know I don't give things without expecting something in return."

"The deal was that you would give me power to kill Itachi. Only after that was I to give you my body. I have not encountered Itachi, especially since you've forbidden me to leave the area. I will not hand myself to you until my end of the trade occurs," Sasuke spat.

"My dear boy, did you think that was the trade? My words were never direct. I only gave you power and what you did with it, I didn't care. Waiting for me to transfer into you never involved Itachi-san. You should not make me wait."

Sasuke felt his throat constrict, but he had to fight for what was rightfully his. "Orochi-"

Orochimaru raised his hand to silence him. "I cannot transfer into a new container until three years from now. You were late the first time, and now you are late again. I will give you another chance to be my container, to keep my power for another three years…but there is a consequence for making me wait again."

"You're going to punish me?" Sasuke said, slightly bewildered and at the same time amused.

"Silence! You don't think I'm capable of punishing you? Sasuke-kun, remember this is not a comradeship," Orochimaru said, leaving only a bewildered and wary Sasuke.

Sasuke glared at Kabuto who laughed quietly in the background. Kabuto adjusted his glasses, and continued to smirk at him.

"I am aware that the reason you wanted power was to kill your brother. It is what drove you here, and it is the driving force in which you train with. You strive for perfection, and you think of nothing else. The results of such extensive training are remarkable," Orochimaru said, eyeing Sasuke. "I have news for you though. Itachi was killed one week ago, while you were on your little trip. I killed him, Sasuke. Someone else has fulfilled your purpose, your sole reason to exist, and that is the consequence you will now have to deal with for being foolish and leaving my sight so carelessly, fully knowing the transfer would be soon."

Sasuke opened his mouth, but words were unable to come out. A thousand thoughts began swirling in his brain, fighting to be voiced, and Sasuke struggled to make sense of it. Itachi was dead? Killed by Orochimaru? No…it was impossible! This could not be true. Maybe he was dreaming? No, he couldn't be dreaming? Or could he be dreaming? He was not sure anymore. He started shaking uncontrollably, and felt a surge of uncontrollable power that just itched to get out. The sharingan turned on and whirled wildly about as Sasuke tried to make some sense, tried to sink in what had just been told to him.

It was his duty to kill Itachi. Itachi was still waiting for him. He still remembered those hateful eyes that glared at him and told him he was weak, told him to hate. Itachi was to die by his hand and no other.

…But… then that meant… Orochimaru was lying? It wasn't worth it for him to lie. Could it then be…. He felt unable to breath, and he took in breaths, but each intake was painful. The fire inside him died and his eyes turned back to their usual coal black.

Orochimaru smiled tightly, and placed a hand on Sasuke's shoulders. "This will teach you to be good. Correct?"

"He can't even speak, Orochimaru-sama. You broke the news to him so suddenly… was that wise?" asked Kabuto, feigning care for the boy.

"Take him to his room as it seems he is unable to move, Kabuto. I have no further use for him. He may rot on the inside, but not on the outside. I will not be occupying his mind, but rather his body. He will still need to be taken care of."

Sasuke felt someone grab his shoulder tightly, forcing him down a dark corridor.

"Finally Orochimaru-sama sees you for what you really are- a selfish, foolish boy. I always told him that you were nothing special, but he held you in such high regard that not even I, his most loyal servant, could change his mind," he said bitterly. "Things are different now, and I will be Orochimaru-sama's right hand man once again. I'm glad you pulled that trick of yours. Now I will be the only one that has not gone against him. I thank you, Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke registered that he was thrown inside his room, and yet he could not get up. Why was he here? Wasn't he in the forest? Was that Kabuto that was talking?

"Look at you, so weak. You can't even get up. You can't walk. Have you truly lost your reason for living as Orochimaru-sama said? Your response to Itachi's death is quite interesting." Sasuke looked up at Kabuto at the mention of Itachi with glazed eyes. "And maybe I can make a medical project out of you. The mind is a strange, complex thing…and trying to get out of your own thoughts…will drive you to the unthinkable," Kabuto whispered, a strange light appearing in his eyes.

"I will give you one piece of advice in return for giving me the honor of having Orochimaru-sama's attention again. Death is your only solution, Sasuke-kun. Die now if you do not want to fall into the depths of your mind and let the darkness enclose you. I have seen similar cases as yours, and you are on the path of destruction. I will not monitor you…so please…surprise me next time I come," Kabuto said slowly before giving Sasuke another glance and leaving the room.

-----

He felt utterly defeated and worthless. He replayed his confrontations with Itachi countless of times and each time he felt he was physically being transported to that specific location. Memories that seemed from long ago brought back the same amount of pressure to kill. In his own reality, he had left everything behind for Itachi. Had it been worth it? He had not done it, after all. He had one thing, and that was power. Yet, in moments of reflection, he doubted it existed and he had to prove it by destroying something in his room.

He felt a sharp pain in the back of his head and he cried in pain. He pulled his black locks, but the pain continued. Surely it was his hair that was causing the pain. He got up from his sitting position and yelled as he stumbled around the room looking for the candle with a hand still pulling on his hair.

Finally, with a shaking hand he lighted the candle, but the light was too bright. He closed his eyes. Shadows were around him, he could feel them taking a hold of him and pulling. Pulling him away from the candle.

He opened his eyes. The candle flickered, and he was alone. He noticed his fists were bloody and his room was unrecognizable but it was not enough. He did not have the proof he needed that gave him the confidence to kill his brother.

He would never give his brother the satisfaction of besting him! He smiled and laughed meekly, and the lock of hair he had managed to pull fell on the floor. He needed to be strong, and he had a plan. Tactics were important, and he would be wise and take things slow. 'All in good time, Sasuke,' he thought.

The candle flickered one more time and died. Enveloping him in the darkness of his room.

-----

Sai sat on Naruto's chair and stared intently at him, his blue eyes hazy with sleep, his hair sticking out on all sides under his nightcap, and his chest slightly exposed thanks to an unbuttoned button. He decided it was time to figure out what exactly he was feeling for the blonde and see if Naruto felt the same way about him.

Naruto waited, his mind slightly wandering and wondering how Sai managed to wake him up during missions right before his dreams went bad, right before they went into the part he couldn't take. He knew it was bearable when Sai was around, something about Sai made him feel like his old self, had him laughing and angry nearly constantly. Lately, though, he'd been feeling something else. A sort of tugging in his loins, an attraction he'd recognized but didn't want to admit or get into. An attraction he feared because of a similar feeling he'd felt three years ago. He cleared his mind and focused back on Sai, not wanting to think about the past too much, but instead of asking Sai what he wanted once again, his lips were caught in a shocking and familiar gesture.

Naruto's eyes went slightly wide as he felt Sai's lips on his own, gentle yet urging, wanting a response from Naruto. Naruto, though, couldn't think. His lips were frozen as images from the past crept up on him. He didn't want to be hurt, not again. He didn't want to experience the same pain twice; he was sure his heart wouldn't be able to take it. He shivered slightly as tears formed in his eyes, but they didn't fall. Instead, he breathed deeply and realized he was free from the searing kiss.

"Naruto?" Sai asked, an unrecognizable emotion in his voice. Naruto snapped back and looked up at Sai, things clicking into place once again.

"Why… why did you kiss me?" Naruto asked, his voice slightly shaking, and looking up at Sai with a furious look on his face. "Why did you kiss me, Sai?" he said, an edge in his voice.

"I'm sorry, Naruto-kun," Sai said, shifting his sad eyes and frowning slightly. "But remember, I'm not Sasuke," he said as understanding crossed his face. Naruto stared at him, shocked once again.

Sai walked over to where he was sitting and placed his hands on Naruto's, slightly caressing them as he looked into Naruto's face. "Naruto, I'm not Sasuke. You must remember that. I don't wish to harm you, ever. I just wanted to confirm my feelings for you and have you know," Sai said, his eyes showing the pain he was feeling as he said this. "I'm sorry to have bothered you, Naruto-kun," he said, and let go of Naruto's hands. He stood up and headed towards the door.

'I'm not Sasuke' echoed in Naruto's mind and as Sai talked to him he stared at Sai, stared at his eyes and saw the pain. He'd felt that pain, the pain of rejection. Sasuke had never felt that pain. Sasuke had never expressed his feelings like Sai had and Naruto wondered how hard it had been for Sai to express himself. He was struggling with his mind, debating with it over what had happened and trying to reason with himself when he felt a sudden coldness hit him. He focused back and realized Sai was leaving, his hands long removed from his own. He was leaving.

"Don't go," Naruto said, his voice pleading. "Please, don't go," he whispered this time, fighting back past memories and focusing on the present.

Sai turned around and watched him. He walked over to his side once again and sat down next to him, watching him and waiting.

"I'm sorry," Naruto said, his voice even softer now. "I'm sorry, Sai," he repeated, before giving him a sad smile. "You see, past things are rather hard to get over and I'm still struggling with them," he said, mumbling out words and trying to make sense to Sai. "I thought I had gotten over them, but when we came face to face with him again, it all came back," Naruto said and Sai nodded, understanding perfectly.

"That's alright, Naruto-kun. I understand and I don't want to trouble you further then," he said, giving him a smile that didn't touch his eyes.

"No, Sai, you're not going to trouble me," Naruto said, reaching out to grab Sai's wrist in order to prevent him from leaving and startling Sai slightly in the process. "I want you," he said, blushing and clearing his throat. "I mean, I want to be with you. If anyone can help me forget, it's you Sai," he said as he stared at Sai, who was looking at him with contemplative eyes.

"You know I won't hurt you, Naruto-kun, and I am more than willing to say yes, but is this really what you want?" Sai asked, trying to hide how much of him wanted Naruto as he waited for an answer. He was startled again when he felt lips on his own. He didn't miss the opportunity to kiss him back though, and after a few seconds they separated. Sai smiled at him as he got up and walked towards the door. "I promise I will never leave you, Naruto," Sai said, kissing his lips once more before standing up and heading towards the door.

"I will see you tomorrow then, Naruto-kun," he said as he opened the door.

Naruto nodded, smiling almost shyly and feeling something different in his chest, something good and happy. He went towards the door and latched it once Sai was out before going back to his bed and letting his heavy eyes close, his mind clear of any nightmare that might have suddenly come up in his mind.

-----

Sasuke grimaced slightly at the smell of blood surrounding him. Otherwise, his face was expressionless. He looked from Orochimaru's dead face to Kabuto's, who seemed to still be alive and in much pain. He felt a smirk coming on, shifting back to his usual self, before he frowned.

What was he going to do now?

He fell to his knees suddenly, holding onto his head with both hands as images accosted him again. Itachi's face, his words, followed by Orochimaru, who now lay dead at his feet. He laughed maniacally as he thought about how he had killed Orochimaru but hadn't been able to kill Itachi, who Orochimaru had killed.

No, Orochimaru couldn't have killed Itachi, he thought frowning. If Orochimaru had been this simple to kill, there was no possible way that Orochimaru could have defeated Itachi. Itachi was still alive and with no other purpose, he had to move.

That, and the smell of blood was getting to him.

Without a second thought, he ran from there, forgetting the fact that he had left Kabuto barely alive in his eagerness. He had to think. Had to figure out where to go, what to do. What if Orochimaru really had killed Itachi, killed him in some tricky sort of way. He might have succeeded then, however smart Itachi was. He stopped suddenly, crouched low on a tree, ignoring his own injuries and trying to think about where to go.

Eventually he started to move again. He had no purpose now. He had to admit it to himself. He didn't want to be a rogue ninja. What did he want? What could he possibly do now that Itachi was dead?

Naruto's face suddenly seeped into his mind and he stopped, eyes going slightly wide. He could go there, but would Naruto take him back?

No, he would have to kill Naruto in order to break the bond and kill Itachi.

But Itachi was already dead, he argued with himself. He sat himself down, clearing his mind and breathing deeply.

Itachi was dead.

Itachi was dead and was not suddenly going to come back.

He had to accept that fact.

He got up again and began running once more, now that his mind was made up. He would take life one step at a time from now on, starting with Naruto.

-----

Two weeks had passed and Naruto was happy. He liked being around Sai, liked a great many things having to do with Sai. He enjoyed the moments when they were together, talking, laughing, occasionally fighting (mostly on his part). He hadn't had a nightmare in a while and his heart felt like it was about to burst.

Which was why he couldn't explain the heavy feeling in his stomach… He was barely paying attention to Sakura, who was mentioning something about Lee, trying to think what could have possibly had him so gloomy, when it hit him.

He nearly cringed visibly, though inside he was tormented. It was the day Sasuke had left, the day Sasuke had fought him so long ago. He didn't notice when the talking stopped nor did he notice when a hand made its way around his waist in a comforting embrace as he continued to think back to the day he would never forget.

"Naruto-kun," Sai whispered in his ear, his lips pressing lightly against it and making a slight shiver go down Naruto's spine, bringing him back to the present.

"Hmm…?" Naruto asked, turning around to look at Sai and realizing Sai's hand around his waist. He blushed slightly as he stared at Sai questioningly.

"I was just wondering why you looked so sad a moment ago," he said, giving Naruto a sly smile. "If it's because you're embarrassed about your penis, you don't have to worry," Sai said, "because-."

"Wait just a minute, Sai!" Naruto answered, anger evident in his features. "First of all, I am not showing you my penis anytime soon and secondly, mine is larger than yours!" He said, pointing a finger at Sai.

"Whatever you say," Sai answered with a sly smile as he got up and led a fuming and slightly embarrassed Naruto away from where they had been sitting.

"By the way, where'd Sakura go?" Naruto asked, calming down slightly yet still looking at Sai through narrow eyes.

"She went to go find Ino after you stopped listening to her," Sai answered, walking alongside Naruto towards his apartment as nighttime began to settle.

"Oh," Naruto answered, remembering what he had been feeling sad about but pushing it quickly out of his mind, slightly annoyed with himself. He was stronger than that. He shouldn't be reminiscing on the past and "what if's" or moaning about his broken heart. Instead he should be enjoying his life, planning what to do with his future, figuring out different ways to get Sasuke back. He realized his thoughts made it seem like Sasuke had escaped from his grasp, from their grasp, and he was disgusted at himself for even thinking that way. He wasn't going to break his promise, no way.

"So, mind sharing what you were so sad about?" Sai interrupted as they neared his apartment.

Naruto shook his head. "It was nothing really. Just a bad memory that suddenly came back up," he said, "but luckily, you were there to snap me out of it," he added as they entered his apartment.

"So I'm your prince in shining armor?" Sai said, smirking as he closed the door behind him.

Naruto scoffed. "Right," he said.

Sai smiled lightly and walked over to him, engaging Naruto in a kiss which Naruto didn't resist. On the contrary, Naruto pressed himself nearer to Sai, deepening the kiss and beginning to slightly moan in pleasure.

Sai kissed him back, an uneasy feeling spreading through him at Naruto's eagerness but extinguishing itself as lust and something he could only guess was love spread themselves over him.

Naruto pushed Sai back against the wall and then began rubbing himself against him, startling Sai. His kisses broke and he began to kiss Sai's jawbone, then neck, his hands caressing the skin right above Sai's pants.

"Naruto," Sai said, his voice hoarse and more of a groan. "Naruto, stop," Sai said and Naruto, shocked, dislodged himself from Sai.

Sai panted slightly, as did Naruto as they looked at each other for a few seconds before Naruto turned away, both in embarrassment and anger.

"Go," Naruto said, "I need my sleep."

"Naruto-," Sai began but Naruto cut him off.

"I said go, goddamn it," he said, balling up his fists and staring at Sai through angry eyes.

"I didn't think you'd want to go this far, Naruto, that's all," Sai said, making no movement towards the door and instead facing Naruto.

"How do you know what I want?" Naruto asked, angry.

"Naruto... I know you… you're trying to forget something and I didn't want you to do something you weren't ready for…," Sai said, "or something you would later regret," he added in a softer voice.

Naruto stared at him, anger leaving his face and hopelessness settling in. "You're right, Sai," he said, ignoring the tears that threatened to make their way towards his eyes. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have pressured you…," he said, "but I wouldn't have regretted it," Naruto added.

Sai smiled. "You never know," Sai said softly, "you might have been forever embarrassed because I would have realized you have no penis."

Naruto nearly smacked him. "Sai, you bastard. That clearly would never be the case," he said as he walked over to Sai, his expression still slightly despondent.

"Hopefully not," Sai said, smirking as he kissed Naruto one last time before making his way towards the door. "Goodnight, Naruto-kun. I'll see you in the morning," he said, giving Naruto the privacy he probably needed at the moment and slightly afraid of what could continue to happen, sure that Naruto wasn't ready for any of it. He hadn't wanted to stop, but had to force himself to stop, to push his emotions back, something he found unable to do around Naruto. He hoped he really was the best for Naruto as he walked back towards his own apartment, not too far from Naruto's own.

-----

Naruto twisted in his bed, his eyebrows furrowing slightly as he faced something in his dreams. It was the same nightmare, he knew. He was walking along the same path and soon would find Sasuke. They would then talk and then he'd be flung into an abyss from which he wouldn't be able to get out of, from which more taunting would ensue. He knew this dream, had it memorized, and was afraid of continuing, but he couldn't wake himself up, couldn't walk down another path, or at least had never tried. He looked towards his left and followed it, afraid of where it might lead to but hoping it would be better than Sasuke's inferno. Trees eventually began to surround him, unlike the barren land in which he usually found Sasuke, and a figure could be seen up ahead, though it was only a dot. He moved towards it, not exactly eager and fearing what he might find, but he puffed out his chest and continued. Fear would never hold him back, he thought to himself as he continued walking, or at least, that was what he hoped.

He neared the figure and saw he was near a body of water, sitting down and relaxing against a tree. He neared the person, curious to know who it was, and stared as various emotions ran through him once the face was visible.

'Sai,' he said and in his dream, Sai looked up at him, opening his eyes and putting on a welcoming smile. 'Naruto-kun, I'm so glad you decided to join me,' he said, his face expressing everything he was feeling. He got up and immediately embraced Naruto, pushing him back only to look at him, the same smile on his lips. 'I was wondering when you would finally come,' Sai said, his lips nearing Naruto's until they were pressed against his own. Naruto felt his own heart do a flutter before Sai moved away, laughing at apparently an expression on Naruto's face. 'Naruto-,' he was about to say when a crash startled Naruto out of his dream.

"Damn it," Naruto heard as he stirred up, completely awake. He heard someone pick up something and continue to walk, or more like drag himself, after placing whatever he had dropped back, and muttering a few curses along the way. Naruto stood up, his hand reaching for the kunai under his pillow and ready to attack, focusing his eyes on the moving figure.

His heart stopped once the figure stepped into the light.

"Sasuke?"

A/N: We hope you enjoyed the story! Please review and tell us what you think :) For updates and previews on the next chapter, visit our livejournal at:

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	2. Secret Illusions

Chapter 2: Secret Illusions

Rating: PG-13 (T-for now)

Pairing: SasuNaru, NaruSai

Disclaimer: We do not own these characters. They all belong to Kishimoto!

**Quixotic Delirium**

**----2----**

_Did I say that I loathe you?  
Did I say that I want to  
Leave it all behind?_

"Sasuke?" he repeated, looking at the boy, no- man, in front of him. He left his bed and walked towards Sasuke in trepidation, his heart beating so loud he was surprised that the person in front of him did not react to it. His mind was surprisingly blank, and the steps towards the unmovable figure were as if in slow motion, making him aware of his harsh breathing, his own heart beat, and his slight steps on the floor. Yet, there was no movement from Sasuke or the illusion in front of him.

"Naruto."

Naruto stopped suddenly and waited for further words. It did sound like Sasuke. He realized he definitely was not dreaming.

"Naruto," repeated Sasuke in a harsh voice.

Maybe Sasuke had decided to kill him, after all. It was different back then. Now, he could probably take down Sasuke - he was quicker and stronger than those years when they were children. He thought before he acted, but this was Sasuke. Would he revert back to old tendencies?

"I…did not come here to harm you. Just listen to me." Sasuke closed the distance between them, and looked coldly at Naruto. "Don't ask me why I came here yet." He closed his eyes. "I will tell you some details, but not all of them."

"Then why should I trust you?" asked Naruto, finally finding his voice.

"Don't you already?" countered Sasuke, his eyes still not betraying anything.

Naruto opened his mouth and closed it abruptly. His lips formed a thin line as he looked at the calm Sasuke in front of him.

"You can't expect to show up and have me believe every word you say. Have you forgotten? Last time I saw you, you seemed very pleased at Orochimaru's side. So please excuse me for not believing you're here on good will. What do you want, Sasuke?" asked Naruto, his voice getting louder. "You unexpectedly show up…you stand there as if you have a right to be so calm. As if nothing ever happened. You hate me," he bitterly continued. "So what do you want?"

"I don't hate you. I just don't believe in some of the things you stand for."

"Oh, is that so?"

Naruto pushed Sasuke back with his right hand. His previously blank mind now burned with different emotions and memories. He felt himself getting madder by the second and close to losing control.

"Is that so, Sasuke? You don't hate me? Your attitude towards me when I saw you seemed to imply a different thing. Orochimaru…"

"Don't mention his name!" snarled Sasuke.

"Don't mention his name? Isn't he your master? The person you willingly follow?" yelled Naruto. "The person you left us for…the person you left me, your friend, for?"

Sasuke remained quiet, his eyes boring into Naruto's own.

"Orochimaru is dead."

"Wait…what?"

"I killed him," Sasuke said quietly.

Naruto looked at Sasuke, his eyes showing his disbelief. Sasuke killed Orochimaru? That was impossible! Unless…the person in front of him was not Sasuke. Wasn't Sasuke supposed to give up his body for Orochimaru at this time? The man in front of him could be Orochimaru. Why had he not thought of this sooner? He was still an idiot...and worse, the man in front of him was going to kill him. Yet, there was a possibility it really was Sasuke? He had to find out somehow.

"You're not Sasuke."

Sasuke quirked an eyebrow and a trace of amusement made his way into his black eyes. "I didn't expect you to say that, Naruto. You of all people should know it really is me."

"I don't trust you."

"You do trust me, Naruto. You're glad that I'm here. Don't lie to me."

"You think you still know me?"

"You don't change. Aren't you glad I am here?"

Naruto narrowed his eyes at Sasuke and took a slight step back. "Don't act like you know me," Naruto said, cold eyes on Sasuke. "Believe it or not, people change… Sasuke..."

Sasuke smirked and sat down on the chair Naruto had, relaxing himself and hoping to relax Naruto as well. "Naruto, you know me better than anyone," he said in a low voice. "You, of all people, should know it's still me."

Naruto relaxed slightly but remained standing up. He glared at Sasuke through cold eyes while a million different thoughts raced through his head. 'Was this really Sasuke?' he thought, biting his lip as he stared at Sasuke, searching him for anything out of the ordinary. No, it was still the same Sasuke. Naruto doubted that an imposter would be able to mimic Sasuke so well. He glared back at Sasuke through narrow eyes. But… what did he want….

"I'm glad I'm still of some interest to you, Naruto," Sasuke said suddenly, standing up and sending Naruto slightly off balance because of their proximity. Sasuke quickly reached for Naruto and steadied him, his arm around Naruto's waist. "Trust me, Naruto," Sasuke said, his smile widening slightly at their proximity. He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, old memories resurfacing before he opened his eyes once again and stared back at Naruto, who was staring at him with wide eyes.

Sasuke looked him over and shook his head slightly. Now was not the time, he thought, letting him go and distancing himself. He moved towards Naruto's only window and opened it, his back to Naruto for a while before turning back, his hands on the window ledges.

"I'll explain everything once I'm back, Naruto," he said, his mind slowly becoming hectic once again. "Trust me," he said, before disappearing out the window and into the night.

Naruto stared after him then sighed, slumping down into his bed and wrapping his arms around his knees as he drew them up to his chin. He leaned against his wall and looked out the window, wondering what to do about the situation, wondering on whether he should be quiet or not.

'Maybe it was just my imagination,' he thought. 'No. No way could I come up with something like that. But, if that was really Sasuke, shouldn't I report him?' Naruto furrowed his eyebrows in deep thought.

No, he decided eventually, after turning over several thoughts in his head and studying the situation thoroughly. No, he wasn't going to turn Sasuke over or tell anyone Sasuke was back. He would leave that up to Sasuke. But… if Sasuke was going to harm anyone in the village… if Sasuke harmed anyone, Naruto would personally kill him.

No, Naruto decided. That risk couldn't be there. He had to figure out a way to eliminate that risk. What if… but no, it would be too risky… but he had no other choice. If he was going to keep Sasuke a secret, he had to keep the village safe as well. That was his topmost priority, should be his topmost priority. He would do it then.

Why was Sasuke back, though? If Orochimaru was truly dead, he was free to do as he wanted, free to hunt down Itachi or do anything else he desired. So why was he back in the village he had given up for power, why had he come back to the person he had nearly tried to kill. He sighed. He was sleepy and he didn't really want to think about it. For now, he would trust Sasuke, like he had done all those years.

"But things do change, Sasuke," he thought aloud as he lay down in his bed and fell asleep, troubled thoughts mixing his dreams.

-----

"Hello, Naruto," Sai said, entering the sleepy blonde's room.

"Hello, Sai," Naruto said, sleepily walking back to his bed and rubbing his eyes. Sai followed and looked at him curiously.

"It's nearly noon, Naruto-kun. And you still look tired," he said, moving his head slightly to the side with a perplexed expression on his face.

Naruto yawned widely and nodded. "Yeah, I had a rough night," he said, rubbing his eyes once again before heading over to his bathroom and washing his face and brushing his teeth. He changed clothes and came back out after a few minutes, yawning loudly.

"We have no mission, today, Naruto-kun, so we can go train," Sai said, still watching Naruto curiously.

"Sure," Naruto said, nodding and smiling, though lacking his usual enthusiasm. Sai frowned slightly, linking it back to last night.

"Naruto, are you all right?" he asked, staring at Naruto intently. Naruto looked at Sai.

'Should I tell him?' he thought. 'No, I shouldn't drag him into it. Then again… he is my… but I don't want him to get hurt…,' he thought.

"No, nothing's wrong Sai," Naruto said, forcing out some of his usual hyperactive self out. "Now let's get going to get a good workout!" he said, pushing Sai off the bed and leading them both out towards the training site.

-----

"Naruto, you're much more distracted than usual," Sai pointed out after his easy victory. Naruto looked up at him with a worried expression before looking away.

"It's nothing," he said. "Just, some problems I have to deal with first."

Sai looked curiously at him before lying down on the grass next to him, looking up at the sky before turning his gaze back to Naruto, who was staring straight ahead with a glazed expression in his eyes.

Something was troubling Naruto, he knew that, but what it was he couldn't figure out. He looked at the outline of Naruto's face and the scars on his cheeks. He watched as Naruto's blonde hair moved slightly in the wind. It was longer than before. Some of the spikes went down to his chin and neck and Sai found he liked it better that way. He stared at Naruto's blue eyes staring far ahead of him and felt an irresistible urge to kiss him. He just looks so tempting, Sai thought, a small smirk on his face as he suddenly got up and kissed Naruto, snapping him out of his thoughts.

Naruto had been lost in his thoughts until Sai had decided to surprise him with the kiss. He had been thinking about the 'Sasuke situation', as he now referred to it, and was trying to figure out what his best move would be when familiar lips were on his own and he focused onto a familiar face.

For some reason he nearly smiled at what Sai had done before kissing him back. He ran his hands through Sai's black hair, loving the way it felt on his fingertips, while tracing patterns onto Sai's back. Sai was unzipping Naruto's orange jacket when a whistle erupted from somewhere around them. They both parted and saw a grey jacket slowly coming closer with a white blur in front of him.

Kiba made his way through the training site and gave a wide grin once he got to where Naruto and Sai were. His grin turned into a sly smile as he noticed Sai's slightly tousled hair and frowning features and Naruto's red cheeks and unzipped jacket. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything," he said, laughing slightly.

"N-No," Naruto said, getting up and holding out a hand for Sai, "we were just practicing," he said as Sai got up.

"Oh, well. Remind me never to practice with you guys then," Kiba said, earning a slight punch from Naruto.

"Right, because you know I'd beat you," Naruto said.

"In your dreams," Kiba answered, answering the challenge in their own terms and moving back in order to attack.

Sai moved back and sat against a tree. He watched as they readied themselves before turning around at the sound of rustling. There was no one in the tree anymore, though, as he stared at it with frowning eyes. He looked back at the two as they sparred, wondering idly who it had been in the tree just a minute ago.

----

It was the same person that he had seen besides Naruto those many months ago in front of Orochimaru. That person was his replacement in Team 7 and it definitely did not sit well with him. In such a short time he had already gotten rather cozy with Naruto and by the look of things, it seemed they were in a relationship. He gritted his teeth in frustration as the kiss he had witnessed replayed over and over again in his mind.

Sure, he and Naruto did not seem to get along to many people, but they had a connection that went far and beyond a simple friendship. In fact, he wasn't sure if it even was a friendship. Whatever it was, it was much stronger than what Naruto and that 'Sai' character had. Wasn't it?

He suddenly stopped and breathed deeply. Naruto obviously did not trust him, and that was certain by his odd behavior at his appearance. Sai was a problem that he had not counted on. Naruto might tell Sai that he held contact with him, and Sai would then tell others. That was not good. He didn't need any foolish people getting in his way.

If Naruto turned him in…or if Naruto ignored him because of Sai…

He snapped the tree branch he was holding in his right hand, and his sharingan came to life. First thing first was to shift Naruto's attention back to him and away from the current… distraction. Naruto would then help him catch Itachi and everything would be settled. He smiled bitterly and looked back towards Naruto's direction. Yes, Naruto would be his again.

----

"Kiba, I'm ready to call it a day."

"What, Naruto? We haven't even trained much! Usually you're the one that wants to continue training for hours straight without rest. Why the sudden change?"

"We have some things to do," quipped Sai, noting how Naruto seemed slightly irritated at the question. "We really should get going, unless you want a full explanation on what we plan to do?" asked Sai slyly.

Kiba crunched his nose. "That's fine. I don't need to know any details of your sordid affair."

"Watch what you are saying, Kiba. I may just tell some people about your own sordid affairs," said Naruto, snapping himself out of his trance and trying to put a smile on his face as he addressed Kiba, and an even bigger smile as he turned to Sai. "Sai, you're treating me to ramen today."

Sai visibly blanched and looked at Naruto with wide eyes. "I'm treating you to ramen? What did I do to deserve that? Make Kiba treat you!"

"Um…I'll see both of you later…I need to go…come on, Akamaru!" yelled Kiba, taking off in a run towards the village with Akamaru besides him.

"It's just you and me then." Sai said, placing a hand around Naruto's waist and heading towards the village.

"Pity," said Naruto jokingly. "Pity I have to be with you."

"You know you like my company," teased Sai.

Naruto smiled tightly and his good mood once again vanished.

"_Sasuke?"_

"_What do you want, Naruto? Can't you see I'm busy?" _

"_You don't seem busy to me. Actually, you don't seem to be doing anything. Bored, are you?"_

"_Go away."_

_Naruto brightly smiled and playfully punched Sasuke's left shoulder. "You know you like my company."_

"_Don't touch me," muttered Sasuke, but a slight upturn of his lips was just visible. _

_Naruto saw the upturn of the lips out of the corner of his eyes and smiled inwardly. Sasuke, cold as ice? He didn't think so._

"Naruto? Naruto?"

"Yeah? Sorry, Sai. Just got carried away with my thoughts, that's all," said Naruto with a shrug of his shoulders. "Race you to the village?"

"Ah, just like a child," said Sai mockingly. He turned towards Naruto with a smile on his face. "In that case, you're on!"

Naruto took off and Sai followed him, trying to gain speed in order to catch up to his boyfriend. His eyes were glued to Naruto's back, and he furrowed his eyebrows at the mystery that was Naruto lately. In the meantime, his wallet was about to suffer.

----

Naruto took off his jacket and threw it on top of his bed. He gave a tug to his hair out of exasperation as he looked outside his window. Sasuke had left four nights ago and he still had not returned. He said he was going to come back, but maybe he had left for good now. He just suddenly turned up to annoy the hell out of him. A brief appearance was all it took to turn his world upside down, but after all, it was Sasuke and it was expected.

He gave a big sigh and got on his bed ready to have another sleepless night thinking about the whereabouts of Sasuke. He truly was pathetic.

----

"Naruto?"

"Hmm…Sasuke?" mumbled Naruto sleepily. Suddenly, something in his mind clicked and he sprung wide awake. There in front of him was Sasuke, looking calm and collected as if he hadn't gone missing.

"You came back?" Naruto asked in disbelief. He got up from his bed and walked towards Sasuke who merely looked bored.

"Does he know about me?"

His steps faltered. "Who are you talking about?"

"Sai. Does he know about me?"

"No he doesn't…but how do you…"

"I saw you with him… kissing," said Sasuke with contained anger. "You must have told him about me if you're that close with him."

"You don't trust me, Sasuke? I'm telling you, I didn't tell him!" said Naruto, raising his voice.

"Well, obviously you don't trust me."

Naruto pulled Sasuke towards him and looked directly into his eyes. "It's not always about you, Sasuke. You are the most selfish bastard I have ever met…It's always you, you, you, and you. You know what? I'm sick and tired of it. You leave me here without a word about where you are going, and you just prance back like nothing's wrong. If I say I didn't tell anyone then I didn't. You told me that I haven't changed, and using your logic, you would know I'm the same honest and loyal person you knew," Naruto said, tightening his grip on Sasuke's shirt before letting go.

"The relationship between Sai and I is none of your business so please stay out of it."

"None of my business?" snapped Sasuke. "Why can't I ask?"

"Why can't I ask what you're here for?"

"That's different."

"That's bullshit."

Sasuke and Naruto glared at each other, making it a contest. They both looked intensely at each other, hoping one would drop their eyes, claiming defeat.

"Itachi is dead," said Sasuke, finally stepping away from Naruto but not taking his eyes off him.

"Are you sure?" asked Naruto, astonished and lost for words at what Sasuke was telling him. Then, if Itachi was dead why did Sasuke leave for four, almost five days? Sasuke could also be lying... he just wasn't sure anymore.

"Orochimaru killed him… Are you happy? Now I've told you what I was hiding. I'm not here to kill you so I can kill Itachi. It's over and done with. I was too late," said Sasuke bitterly, his eyes flashing.

"I…I don't know what to say…"

"Don't say a word. I have to go."

"You just got here! What do you mean you're leaving? Where are you going?"

"You'll know when I come back. I have some things to take care of. Don't tell that boyfriend of yours anything."

Sasuke turned to leave and was almost out the door when a hand stopped him. "I won't tell Sai. You have my word. Do I have your word that you'll be back?" whispered Naruto, looking anxiously at Sasuke.

Naruto looked back in shock as Sasuke turned his gaze at him, and he found himself staring at the sharingan.

"I need to find Itachi," said Sasuke coldly.

Naruto's hand fell from Sasuke's shoulders and he stared at his friend in confusion. Before he could process anything, or even make the request he had decided on, Sasuke was on.

----

"Naruto? Naruto?"

"Sasuke?" he mumbled sleepily. He opened his eyes and looked at the face in front of him.

"Sai…"

A/N: Review :) Sorry for the wait…but at least it's done!


	3. Learning

Chapter 3: Learning

Rating: PG-13 (T-for now)

Pairing: SasuNaru, NaruSai

Disclaimer: We do not own these characters. They all belong to Kishimoto!

**Quixotic Delirium**

**----3----**

_I am learning to abandon the world   
before it can abandon me. _

"Sai…"

An uncomfortable silence followed and Naruto averted his eyes from Sai's piercing gaze. He really had messed up, but what could he do now? He wasn't lucky enough to have Sai brush off the whole thing, and by the looks of it, Sai wasn't going to let the incident pass.

"What did you just say?" asked Sai bitingly.

"I said, Sasuke. I'm sorry Sai, I don't know where that came from…"

"Don't give me excuses, Naruto. You should know better than that. I'm not that stupid. You said his name, thinking he was in this room. Was this because you were dreaming about him," he retorted. "Or is it because you actually expected him to be here?"

"Sai, both of us haven't seen Sasuke in months. What makes you think the he would just show up? That's ridiculous!"

"Not as ridiculous as the fact that you've been acting extremely odd for the last couple of days, so odd in fact, that people are starting to talk about your sudden decrease in hyper activeness. Imagine their surprise when they realized they missed the old you. I know you are hiding something, and it does hurt that you don't trust me enough to confide in," Sai said rather angrily, an emotion he wasn't entirely familiar with just yet.

"Sai…it's nothing like that," said Naruto in a small voice, opting to stare at his bed sheets. "Sasuke is not here nor has he returned. Feel free to look around my apartment. You won't find anything that would alert you of his presence."

"I prefer you telling me the truth instead of having me look. You've disappointed me, Naruto."

Naruto visibly flinched. Sai didn't deserve to be lied to, but he had no choice. He had to keep Sasuke a secret, and most importantly, he had given Sasuke his word that he would keep it all a secret. 'But you're hurting Sai,' a small voice said in the back of his head, sending him into further thought.

Why did everything have to be so difficult, and why did he have to say Sasuke's name? He really had no choice, and he refused to listen to the part of his brain that kept reminding him that he was placing Sai, the man that loved him, behind Sasuke. He was being selfish and he knew it, but his priority was Sasuke at the moment. He could handle Sai later.

"You're right. Lately, I haven't been myself but it's nothing for you to worry about. Nothing is going on. I'm fine, really."

Sai raised an eyebrow and moved away towards the edge of the room. "We have a mission today," he said, anger visible in his eye. "Meet down by the usual place as soon as you're ready." He disappeared without another word, leaving Naruto alone in his room.

-----

Sai sighed as he waited for Kakashi, who had been placed as Team 7's leader once again, and Sakura. He pulled out a drawing pad and a pencil and began to draw, perching himself on a tree and losing himself in his drawing until a cough brought him back to reality.

"Nice drawing there, Sai," Kakashi said, taking his eyes off his book for a moment to give Sai's drawing a good look before going back to his book. "Where's Naruto?"

Sai shrugged and closed his drawing pad, giving his drawing one last look before packing it away. He jumped down and landed next to Sakura, who was looking slightly annoyed that Naruto was late.

"And the one day when Kakashi's early," she said, muttering to herself and controlling her anger from getting the best of her.

A few minutes later, Naruto was running towards them, an apologetic smile on his face. "Sorry, you guys, I guess I slept in," he said, chuckling slightly.

Sakura glared at him but before she could begin her rant, Kakashi had put his book away and was standing in between all of them. "Alright then," Kakashi said, "this mission's slightly different than anything you've done before, so get ready. A prince from a nearby nation is having his party, but he needs an escort, either a young man or lady to act as his promised. One of you will be fulfilling that role while the other two will blend into the crowd and watch for any suspicious activity. So now that you've all been informed, let's go. We were supposed to have been on our way about an hour ago," he said, jumping up into the tree and continuing once the others were following.

All three of them got over their initial shock soon enough and were following Kakashi, questioning him about the mission. "Are you sure you got the mission right?" Sakura asked, not truly believing what they were going to have to do.

Kakashi nodded. "The prince asked for someone to be sent to him as an escort. That escort will also be in charge of protecting him at all times and will be with him for two days, the amount of time the celebration lasts," Kakashi said.

Sai nodded, though he was still confused about the overall thing, and looked back at Naruto, who seemed to be dwelling over his own thoughts and was uncharacteristically quiet, something he had been doing a lot of since Sasuke had left.

'What if Sasuke decides to come back within these two days?' Naruto was thinking, biting his lip, a habit that was slowly beginning to form. He continued jumping, barely paying attention to the conversation as he thought about what he should do, what he could miss. Sasuke might not even go during that interval of time, though. Naruto frowned slightly. And who was he to be waiting around for Sasuke. He had a life, too, that he needed to keep going. He couldn't focus his entire self on Sasuke. Other things had to be looked after. He needed the money from the mission to pay rent and buy a few groceries. Feeling someone's eyes on him, he looked up and stared right at Sai, who was just shifting his eyes away in frustration. A twinge of guilt flowed through him. He had to make it up to Sai, somehow. He couldn't tell him, but he had to ease his mind.

He made his way over to Sai's side and stayed there until he was finally noticed. A pair of frustrated eyes made their way over to him. "What do you want?" Sai said in a cold voice that stung Naruto.

"I just wanted to say I'm sorry," Naruto said, looking at Sai hopefully and trying to piece his words carefully.

"You shouldn't have bothered coming out of your thoughts on Sasuke," Sai said, moving slightly faster and ahead of Naruto.

"Damn it, Sai," Naruto said, getting slightly annoyed that he wasn't being allowed to get a word in. "What happened in the morning was a mistake. I was having a dream about Sasuke, but it wasn't what you think," he said, his voice getting slightly softer. "Most of my dreams with Sasuke turn into nightmares," he said, shifting his eyes away from Sai's face before continuing to talk. "I'm sorry to have gotten you mad. I would probably have gotten mad too, if you were suddenly saying someone else's name in your dreams, but…."

"It's not what I'm thinking?" Sai said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Naruto sighed and was about to continue when Kakashi suddenly stopped them.

"We're here!" Kakashi said, smiling slightly before going down onto the stone path and beginning to climb a few stairs towards what was obviously the palace. Naruto didn't have time to continue his talk with Sai as they were ushered in by very enthusiastic servants into the main room.

"I'm glad you could finally make it," said a rather annoyed looking man. "The prince is waiting in his bedroom," he said, turning around and leading the way up a few stairs and through corridors until they were in front of two doors.

"The visitors have arrived," he said, rapping on the door gently while giving Team 7 a rather angry glare.

"Send them in," they heard a voice say from the other side and the man sighed and rolled up his eyes before complying. He opened the doors and led them all into the chamber, where the Prince was sitting on a chair, a table and papers around him. He looked up and smiled at them before standing up, his blood-red robe flowing behind him. "I'm glad you could finally make it," he said, "I was getting worried you were going to get lost along the way." His brown hair contrasted sharply against his pale skin and his green eyes sparkled as he looked over them all, even Kakashi. His eyes went through all of them then back again before his eyes finally stopped on Naruto.

"I want you," he said, pointing at Naruto, to everyone's surprise. "He seems rather sad and serious at the moment," the Prince said, "exactly what I need from my fiancée." He looked over Naruto one more time before speaking again. "Have them show you the guest rooms," he said, "all except Naruto. He will be staying here with me," he said, pausing to think slightly before continuing. "Yes, it would be better if he could stay here. Tell them to bring him some clothes. The rest of you can leave," he said, dismissing them all except for Naruto.

"And your name is?"

"Uzumaki Naruto," said Naruto, now clearly taking a good look at the Prince. He seemed a couple of years older than him, probably around 21. He felt clumsy and foolish compared to the man in front of him, whom stood in a regal manner and looked down at him.

"Nice to meet you," said the Prince, extending his hand and grasping Naruto's. "I'm Prince Ryuuga Hideki, but you can just call me Hideki." He smiled warmly at Naruto and motioned toward a chair in front of him. "Please have a seat, you seem to be pondering something. A lot of troubles?"

"Yes, way too many troubles," said Naruto with a big sigh. "But don't worry. I won't let my troubles affect this mission. I'm here to protect you and that takes first priority."

"I'm glad you think that, but even if you keep your troubles to yourself and don't tell anyone…in the end you will just suffer more. By the look of it, your troubles revolve love. Love and maybe lust. Am I correct?"

Naruto shifted in his seat and wondered how this man in front of him could see through him so easily. He really needed someone to talk to, and for some reason he felt that the prince was trustworthy. He wouldn't be able to tell him directly about Sasuke, though, but he did need to get everything off from his chest.

"Yeah, you're right."

"Do you want to talk about it? You can trust me, Naruto. I know what you are going through."

"I…."

"You don't think I can help you?"

"Well, it's not that easy…"

Prince Hideki got up and sat next to Naruto. "You're the type that has trouble talking to someone… well, maybe if I tell you about myself and why I may help you….maybe you'll talk."

Naruto looked up and stared back at the warm green eyes in front of him. It wouldn't hurt to give it a shot would it? He could always think that the information the Prince gave him was helpful for their mission.

"I was in love with someone some time ago. That certain someone had to leave the country and, well, I couldn't follow. I have responsibilities as a Prince, and I couldn't leave my people behind. My father was here but he depended on me so much that leaving was not an option. So I decided to stay and that person left. I thought I would get over it -- I was only 15. Just a phase, you understand?"

Naruto nodded and looked down at his lap. He was still unsure of where the conversation was going, but Prince Hideki kept going. Why would he trust Naruto with such knowledge?"

"I met someone else two years later and I thought that person was the answer to everything. It was going well, and I thought I loved him and that he loved me back. I hinted that I would have to find someone soon but he would always laugh it off and I would too. I would tell him how the whole situation was foolish and how I really never wanted to settle down, and rather just do as I please."

"I thought being Prince was your priority?"

"I thought it was."

"What do you mean?" asked Naruto, furrowing his eyebrow. "You seemed pretty sure."

Prince Hideki stood up and started pacing back and forth. "The second person I was with, I was happy with because we never really got serious. Not serious enough for something long lasting to come out of it. I never paid much attention to that. Eventually it got to the point that our relationship really did need to go to the next step. We were stuck somewhere that we needed to get out of. I started to get letters from the person that left to the other country. He was still over there, and just wanted to get in touch with me. The letters started to get more personal and I would sometimes think of him, but I would repress those thoughts and move on."

"We got in a big fight, and he told me he wanted me to commit myself to him. I, of course, kept silent and just listened. He asked me to say yes or no, and when I told him I wasn't ready he threw the letters I had been writing to my lost…lover, to my face. To him it had been cheating, and he thought I started doing that when things had started to get serious between us."

"He left me, but he told me something I haven't forgotten. He told me that I was afraid of commitment and that I put on a façade. I would say it was because of my people but in reality, I was afraid of committing to someone."

"Is he right?" asked Naruto, eyeing the man that had stopped walking in front of him.

"I thought he was saying things that were nonsense, but some months later, my old lover told me he was coming back and he wanted me to meet him. I panicked and never replied back."

"Why? Were you really afraid?"

"I found out that, yes, I was afraid of commitment. In the end, I lost both of them because I was afraid. I never pursued anything because I was an idiot. I lost two things that I cannot replace now. Everything went to waste, along with my feelings."

Prince Hideki sat down once again, and placed his hands on his lap. "Now I have been reduced to have someone being my escort because the people are talking that I am never with anyone, and they need me to marry to produce heirs."

Naruto looked at the man in front of him, and he realized that the Prince no longer looked regal, but rather, he looked just like himself.

-----

The talk with the Prince left Naruto thinking of his own situation, and he knew the Prince wanted to say something else but he didn't. It seemed that he wanted Naruto to figure it out on his own. 'Some help would be nice!' Naruto thought. Help, instead of leading him around in circles! If the Prince hadn't noticed by now, he wasn't very good at figuring things out.

"Naruto!"

"Sakura…Sai…" he muttered as he saw Sai behind Sakura, still looking at him with cold eyes.

"Why aren't you with the Prince? You know that's what we're here for! To protect him…you should know better Naruto. If you are his escort you have to be with him at all times!"

"He's asleep, Sakura. I can have a small break, can't I?"

"A break from doing nothing?"

"Sai!" cried Sakura. "That's not true!"

"Sakura, please excuse us," said Sai looking straight at Naruto. Sakura looked back and forth between them, and then, with a roll of her eyes, got the hint and left them alone.

"I thought you didn't want to talk to me."

"I don't."

"Then? Why are you here?"

"Naruto! The Prince just woke up, you need to head back," interrupted Kakashi, popping out of nowhere though not taking his eyes off the book held in his hands. "He's waiting for you."

Sai glared at Kakashi and then turned back to Naruto, but Naruto had already left.

-----

The day past without any significant events occurring. Naruto had spent the entire day with the Prince and had not seen Kakashi, Sakura, or even Sai. He was beginning to miss Sai, even if Sai was being a complete bastard to him, although it was understandable. It was his fault. Preparations were being made for the ball that was going to be held the following day, and Naruto wished it would all end.

To top it off, the Prince had not mentioned anything about their conversation and Naruto wanted some answers. He couldn't just ask him, though.

"You need to decide what you want, Naruto. I cannot decide for you," said a voice behind him.

Prince Hideki raised an eyebrow and then pointed to his room. "It's getting late; we need to get some rest. Tomorrow is a big day…the façade continues," he said, smiling lightly.

"Only because you're letting it continue," whispered Naruto.

The smile dropped of Prince Hideki's face as he nodded. "I know, Naruto, I know."

"Naruto."

"Sai?"

"Prince Hideki, can I please talk to Naruto? He'll be with you shortly."

Prince Hideki nodded and left to his quarters, leaving both Naruto and Sai alone.

"Follow me."

Both of them walked in silence out into the gardens of the Royal Family. The air smelled of the various flowers that were in full bloom, and the beauty of the gardens was beyond anything they had ever seen before. They walked past the benches, and Naruto soundlessly followed Sai until Sai finally stopped.

He looked up at the tree in front of him and was on top of one of its massive branches in an instant. "Well, are you coming or not?"

Naruto looked up at Sai, and in the darkness with only the moonlight lightly shining on him. He could easily have been mistaken for Sasuke. Naruto sighed, closing his eyes and wishing for those thoughts to end before jumping up and joining Sai.

They stared out into the horizon until Naruto fell a hand graze his cheek. "Sai…"

"Naruto, I have been thinking… I really miss you, and I hate being in this situation, but can you at least understand why I'm being this way? I miss my boyfriend. I miss the guy I originally met. You are so different, yet you are the same. Everything that has been going on lately has thrown me out of a loop…and I just never expected this. I mean," he chuckled lightly, "I never read this anywhere."

Naruto laughed and leaned into Sai. "I know I've been acting like an idiot, but please, understand me, Sai. Things will work out in the end and everything will be fine, I promise."

"I'm just paranoid about Sasuke….please just promise me this, Naruto. Promise me that there is no one else…that it's just you and me…that Sasuke is out of this picture and it's just us. Please just give me this promise, and I swear I will not bother you about it anymore. I miss you, and I want this back…"

Naruto looked at Sai's dark eyes, and, hating himself with the uttermost passion, replied quietly. "I promise."

Sai smiled and tenderly kissed Naruto, relishing in the taste he had missed. "Thank you."

Naruto smiled back, and when Sai returned the smile, Naruto knew that he had mastered the art of lying. He leaned back against Sai, and he made himself want to be where he was. He was loved here, where else could it be better?"

Sai took out his drawing pad and continued drawing a picture that had been left unfinished for a couple of days. He laughed slightly as he worked in the moonlight.

"What are you working on?"

"Konoha."

-----

"You're here late."

"I know, I'm sorry. I was with Sai and we lost track of time. Why are you still awake, shouldn't you be getting rest?"

"Sai. Is he the one you are having problems with? Or one of the ones?"

"Yes…"

"You're still reluctant to talk."

"It's not that I'm reluctant to talk. It's just that you need to know everything in order to understand my situation, but unfortunately, I can'tt tell you everything."

"How about a short version of it?"

Naruto shook his head. "That's out of the question."

"I don't know what to tell you, Naruto. You're digging yourself into a hole, and I think you've just put yourself in a position in which getting out is going to be nearly impossible. Either way, nothing is impossible. Just remember not to think selfish thoughts. Selfishness will get you nowhere and will only leave you miserable and lonely. It's a long road."

"Thank you for trying to be helpful. I think I understand how all of this relates to me, and I really do appreciate it, but I have done this to myself and I'll get myself out."

-----

"Enjoying the ball?"

"Very much so."

"Enjoying being my fiancé?" asked the Prince with a slight smirk.

"There is nothing more romantic than being in love with a Prince."

"There is nothing more romantic than being taken away from your own party." 

"Sai! You can't be near me. People are going to start to talk."

"Oh, Naruto, you make it sound like, when I'm near you, it's only to do something….to you."

Naruto felt a hand start to snake its way around his waist when he pulled it away. "Sai! Behave!"

"You aren't any fun. Don't you want some drama? People tend to like that."

"Sai, we need to be patrolling the area. What are you doing here?"

"I'll be right there, Kakashi-sensei."

Sai winked at Naruto and mocked glared at Prince Hideki before leaving.

"Come on, you need to come with me and meet some families."

"If this is what it's like to be engaged, then I don't want any of this," said Naruto, waving his arms around.

"Don't bite your tongue."

-----

"I wish to thank you for your services. It was great having everyone here. Nothing happened, but it was better to be safe than sorry, right?" Prince Hideki asked, looking at Naruto.

"I really liked it here," said Sakura. "Kakashi-sensei, if they need anything here, please send us back!"

Kakashi shook Prince Hideki's hand. "Come on everyone, let's go back home."

"Good luck, Naruto," whispered Prince Hideki.

Naruto smiled, took Sai's hand, and started the journey home.

"It's good to be going back to Konoha, isn't it?"

"Mmhhmm" said Naruto.

"You sure don't seem excited."

"Oh I am…just tired…."

Sai squeezed his hand. "Tired? Pity."

Naruto gave Sai a big smile, but his mind was whirling with thoughts. Had Sasuke returned?

-----

Naruto walked into his apartment, tugging off his sweaty shirt and taking off his Konoha headband, his shoes already by the door. He was near the bathroom door when he suddenly tensed before being pushed back roughly against a wall.

His chakra flared up momentarily in defense, but when he recognized the intruder, it died. "Sasuke, what are you doing here?" he asked, tiredly.

Sasuke stared at him, his sharingan flaring. "You know fucking well what I'm doing here. You asked me to come here," Sasuke said, his hands around Naruto's wrists, pinning him to the wall.

Naruto looked away, his eyes shifting to the side and remained silent, though his eyes had sparkled up slightly, something that Sasuke's sharingan hadn't missed.

Sasuke calmed down and let go of Naruto, but remained where he was, if anything, pressing closer to Naruto. "Where were you?" he asked, his voice low, his breath ghosting over Naruto's bare shoulder.

"I was on a mission," Naruto said, becoming nervous due to their proximity and struggling to remain apathetic. 'Think of Sai,' he thought to himself, closing his eyes and drawing in a deep breath.

Lips were suddenly placed on Naruto's and his eyes widened, his hands immediately rising to push Sasuke back. Swifter movements caught them before he could do anything and the kiss continued, though Naruto refused to respond to it. Sasuke pulled back after a while, disregarding Naruto's unresponsive nature, and whispered "I missed you" into his ear before moving back and stepping aside.

A red Naruto faced him, eyes flashing. "What do you think you were doing, Sasuke?! You have no right to kiss me, no right to demand to know where I was. After being gone, for three fucking years, don't you dare start asking me why I'm not here," Naruto said, breathing harshly. He ran a hand through his blonde locks, sighing deeply as Sasuke stood just staring at him, no emotion on his face.

"What did you do while I was away?" Naruto asked, catching Sasuke, who was expecting another outburst, unaware. "What were you doing?" Naruto repeated, his voice dangerously low.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow, surprised. "I looked for Itachi and found him. Orochimaru was right, he was dead," Sasuke said, his sharingan off now and his coal black eyes looking strangely empty.

Naruto stared at him, unsure of what to do. "So what are you going to do now?" Naruto asked.

Sasuke uncharacteristically shrugged. "I don't know," he said, "I can't exactly come back into the village just yet. I don't want to. I only want you to know I'm here," Sasuke said, before shifting his eyes.

Naruto sighed, feeling himself softening up. He sat down on a chair and thought things through. "We're going to have to let the hokage know you're here," Naruto said.

Sasuke tensed up slightly. "I know," he said, "just not now. Please, just give me a bit of time, Naruto," he said. "I still have some things left to do."

"Like what?" Naruto asked curiously, sad that his bath was going to be pushed back.

"I still have to kill Itachi," Sasuke said, looking slightly annoyed now.

Naruto stared at him for a good minute before asking him to repeat himself.

"I'm going to find Itachi and kill him," Sasuke said slowly, once again, his anger evident as his sharingan sparked back to life.

"But didn't you just tell me you've confirmed his death? Didn't… Orochimaru kill him?" Naruto asked in a low voice, confused.

"No," Sasuke answered in a tight voice. "Kabuto and Orochimaru are dead. I killed them," Sasuke said. "They are no longer a threat to this village or to me. As for Itachi, I've still got to capture him and I wanted to know if you'd help," Sasuke said, his voice relaxing slightly as he spoke, his eyes not leaving Naruto's figure.

Naruto stared at the floor, his hands forming into fists. "I don't know what kind of game you're playing, Sasuke. This is the second time you're telling me two different things so get your facts straight. Is Itachi dead or not?" Naruto asked, his eyes meeting Sasuke's.

A thread of doubt weaved itself into Sasuke's mind before he shook it off, his hands instinctively clutching his head as he struggled with his thoughts.

"Itachi isn't dead, Naruto," he said in a whisper, his eyes lifting up to meet Naruto's.

Naruto stared at him, unsure of what to think. His promise to Sai was important, but Sasuke was having troubles, that was evident, and a friend in need required his attention.

'It's not like Sasuke's coming between us though,' Naruto thought. 'I'm just helping out an old friend,' he reasoned, working out the situation around the promise.

"Sasuke, I can't exactly help you," Naruto said, "but I will try to do what I can. I still have missions to work on, training to do. I can't just suddenly give that up and focus on this, but –,"

He was cut off by two lips pressed roughly against his, ideas of reconquest back on a certain Uchiha's mind. He was sure that spark before had been there. Their old flame hadn't died out, it just had to be rekindled, fuel just had to be added, before it burned once again.

Sasuke let his hands trace over Naruto's back and was slightly surprised when he felt a small movement of lips against his own before being pushed back.

"Sasuke, what we had… I'm with Sai now," Naruto said, his voice slightly wavering.

Inwardly, Sasuke smiled, but outwardly, he put on a display of disappointment and abandonment. He nodded and shifted back, creating room between them.

"I'll come back in two days. I'll be at the Uchiha manor looking around. I doubt anyone will find me there," he said, before stepping out the window.

"Two days," Naruto whispered as Sasuke vanished from his window. He sighed and sat back down, cursing himself because he had given in, feeling guilty because Sasuke had tempted him and he'd done nothing. He had pushed back, but after a while.

He walked into his bathroom, confused about Sasuke's responses, confused about the attraction he still felt towards Sasuke that conflicted with his feelings towards Sai. He knew he couldn't choose one over the other, at least not at the moment. One needed him, how badly, he wasn't sure, and the other one loved him.

He sighed as he let the water pour down his back, closing his eyes and wishing showers really could wash all your troubles away.

-----

Sai felt a stinging sensation in his chest he'd never felt before. He had even raised a hand to cover his heart to try and soothe the pain he was currently feeling.

He was discovering two things: Emotional pain was ten times worse than physical pain and, he now believed, it really could kill you.

He wasn't sure what to feel though. Several emotions were crashing around him and he didn't know what to do with them, how to let them out. These emotions he couldn't repress.

He shut his eyes only to have the scene he had currently witnessed play once again through his eyes.

Sasuke steadied himself on the window ledge, a smirk on his face as he muttered something before disappearing and a few seconds later, Naruto had come to the window, a dazed look in his eyes and his pink lips slightly darker than before, almost red, with a small blush covering his cheeks.

Sai's eyes had gone wide as what he saw could only mean one thing. He felt his heart skip a beat, was sure it had stopped at one point. He felt something strange stinging his eyes as well as a feral eruption wanting to escape his lungs. But he couldn't, he didn't know how. Without Naruto, without the one that had made him feel in the first place, he didn't know what to do with these emotions anymore. Except now, Naruto wasn't there anymore.

Naruto had broken their promise.


End file.
